15 Words and Phrases to Banish from Your Sales Email Subject Lines in 2023
As a busy sales professional, you‘re fighting an uphill battle to get your emails opened and read. Consider this: the average office worker receives 121 emails per day, yet only opens about 20% of them.
With inboxes overflowing and attention spans shrinking, your email subject line is the gatekeeper that determines whether your message gets trashed or treasured. In fact, 47% of email recipients decide whether to open an email based on the subject line alone.
But here‘s the harsh truth: if you use the wrong words in those critical 6-8 characters, you could subconsciously trigger spam filters, set off "salesy" alarm bells, or worse – bore your prospect to tears. Even well-meaning subject lines can sabotage your open rates if they rely on overused phrases or vague jargon.
To boost your email engagement in 2023, make every word earn its place by eliminating these 15 subject line sinkholes:
1. "15 minutes"
Why it doesn‘t work: Asking for a prospect‘s time before you‘ve provided any value is like proposing marriage on a first date – way too presumptive! You haven‘t yet earned the right to a meeting.
What to say instead: Focus on sharing an interesting insight, tip or resource that provides upfront value. Try "[Quick question about {{challenge}}]" or "[Idea for {{goal}}]".
2. Your company name
Why it doesn‘t work: Unless you work for Google, Apple or Tesla, don‘t assume your prospect knows or cares who you are. Wasting precious characters on your company name screams "I‘m a self-centered sales rep!"
What to say instead: Put the spotlight on your prospect by referencing their company, role or industry instead. "[{{FirstName}}, saw you‘re hiring at {{Company}}]" beats "Acme Co. product demo" any day.
3. "Hi [Name]"
Why it doesn‘t work: Personalization in 2023 needs to go beyond inserting a first name token. This bare minimum effort looks lazy and generic, not "custom".
What to say instead: Show you‘ve done your homework by mentioning a common connection, recent company news, or shared interest. "[Fellow {{City}} marathon runner here]" or "[Congrats on the {{Accomplishment}}!]" spark instant rapport.
4. "Quick call?"
Why it doesn‘t work: This vague request translates to "Let me verbally vomit a generic pitch at you." Not exactly an enticing value prop!
What to say instead: Get specific about the unique value and insights you can provide in a conversation. Pique their curiosity with lines like "[3 ways {{Company}} can cut costs]" or "[Your competitor‘s secret {{Specialty}} sauce]".
5. Misspellings
Why it doesn‘t work: Typos and grammatical goofs tell your prospect you‘re careless and unprofessional. If you can‘t proofread a 6-word subject line, what does that say about your attention to detail?
What to say instead: Use spell check religiously and get a second set of eyes before hitting send. It takes 10 seconds and could be the difference between a new deal or a deleted message.
6. "Re:"
Why it doesn‘t work: Prefacing your subject line with "Re:" to trick prospects into thinking you‘ve corresponded before is an outdated gimmick. Most savvy buyers see right through this "fake familiarity" tactic.
What to say instead: If you want to reference a previous touchpoint, be direct and specific. "[Following up on your {{Event}} keynote]" or "[Saw your comment on {{ArticleTitle}}]" prove you‘ve done your due diligence.
7. Branded terms
Why it doesn‘t work: Peppering in your company‘s unique acronyms and trademarked lingo makes your subject line sound like marketing fluff. Why waste space on terms your prospect doesn‘t understand or care about?
What to say instead: Speak your prospect‘s language by framing your offering through their lens. "{{Competitor}} uses {{Stat}} inefficient processes" beats "Introducing Acme‘s QuantumLeap® Optimization Suite" hands down.
8. "Connecting"
Why it doesn‘t work: This vague jargon doesn‘t give the recipient any compelling reason to engage. "Connecting" about what? To help with what? Hinting at an agenda without clearly articulating one sows suspicion.
What to say instead: Leverage a timely trigger event or cite a specific challenge you can help with. "[{{Q2 Goal}} in danger? I can help.]" or "[Just met your boss at {{Conference}}]" give context for the outreach.
9. "Outreach"
Why it doesn‘t work: To most buyers, the word "outreach" conjures up images of soul-sucking cold calls and junk mail avalanches. It screams "sales pitch ahead!"
What to say instead: Humanize your reason for reaching out with a warm opener like "Quick {{Industry}} question" or "Love your {{ProjectName}} approach."
10. "Touch base"
Why it doesn‘t work: Here‘s another cliché that squanders a golden opportunity to grab attention and add value. Without a compelling reason to connect, "touching base" is a hard pass.
What to say instead: Name drop a mutual connection, relevant event, or timely trigger as your reason for reaching out. "{{CommonFriend}} said I should meet you" or "See you at the {{Tradeshow}} next week?" work wonders.
11. "Services"
Why it doesn‘t work: Calling yourself a "services provider" makes your email seem overly transactional. No one wants to feel like just another notch on your quota belt!
What to say instead: Position your offering as a tailored solution to their most pressing challenges instead of a one-size-fits-all service. "[New {{Regulation}} requirements for {{Industry}}]" beats "Acme Compliance Services" every time.
12. "Great deal"
Why it doesn‘t work: Unless you‘ve nurtured a relationship and established deep trust, teasing a "great deal" right off the bat seems aggressive and self-serving.
What to say instead: Lead with insights, relevant case studies, or thought leadership content first. Once you‘ve proven your worth, a subject line like "[Special {{Offering}} price for {{Company}}]" feels like a welcome reward, not a cheap ploy.
13. "[FIRSTNAME]"
Why it doesn‘t work: Overt personalization token errors make you look sloppy and erode trust fast. Accidentally inserting a placeholder like "FIRSTNAME" is a dead giveaway this is a mass email blast.
What to say instead: Triple check your merge fields before scheduling any campaigns. When in doubt, a contextual opener like "Quick follow-up to our {{Event}} chat" is safer than risking a cringe-worthy "Dear [VALUED PROSPECT]" flub.
14. "Free"
Why it doesn‘t work: Along with other marketing-speak like "limited time offer," "complimentary," and "sale," the word "free" is likely to trigger spam detectors and exile your email to the promotions wasteland.
What to say instead: If you‘re offering a genuinely valuable resource, reframe it as an educational asset instead of a "freebie." "[{{Challenge}} Troubleshooting Checklist]" sounds more helpful than "[Free Whitepaper Download!]".
15. "Urgent"
Why it doesn‘t work: Ascribing false urgency to non-critical messages is the email equivalent of "crying wolf." Overusing this term erodes your credibility and instructs prospects to ignore future "urgent" pleas.
What to say instead: Reserve this term for truly time-sensitive communications, like "[Contract expires tomorrow – please advise]". To spur timely action on non-urgent messages, try an intriguing cliffhanger like "[Acme Co.‘s unconventional hiring approach]".
In addition to purging these 15 overused words and phrases, steer clear of these other engagement-killing subject line mistakes:
| Mistake | Why It Hurts Open Rates | Example | Suggested Fix |
|---|---|---|---|
| Using "meeting" | Sounds obligatory and burdensome | "Meeting next week?" | "[Your Q4 roadmap question]" |
| Pushing "products" | People want solutions, not products | "Our new ABC product" | "[How ABC solves {{Challenge}}]" |
| Calling out "[pain point]" | Generalizing pain can feel presumptive | "[Struggling to hit quota?]" | "[Your peer‘s quota-crushing secret]" |
| Asking "Can we chat?" | Doesn‘t provide a specific, compelling reason | "Can we chat?" | "[Saw you‘re hiring – I can help!]" |
| Using negative terms | Words like "unfortunately" and "problem" tank opens | "Unfortunately…" | "[Next steps on {{Positive Result}}]" |
According to a Yesware analysis of 115 million emails, the top performing subject lines averaged just 4 words and 1-5 words produce the best open rates. Long, meandering openers not only get truncated by email displays, they muddle your message and motivation.
Now that we‘ve covered the words, phrases, and approaches to avoid, let‘s break down a simple, effective formula for crafting a perfect sales email subject line in 2023:
[Personalized tie-in] + [Specific value] + [Urgency or timeliness]
Here‘s how it works in practice:
"[{{FirstName}}, saw you‘re expanding to {{Location}}] + [3 tips to ease the transition] + [based on our {{Industry}} experience]"
"[Your {{Accomplishment}} recap] + [Additional {{Specialty}} benchmarks] + [2 slots left to discuss this month]"
This framework leverages several key psychological principles that boost opens and engagement:
- Personalization: References to the individual prospect, their company or recent trigger events grab attention and build intrigue.
- Specificity: Concrete details and numbers make your value proposition more tangible and credible.
- Timeliness: Implying urgency or scarcity taps into people‘s innate FOMO and drives faster responses.
Like most things in sales, getting subject lines right takes experimentation. What works for one audience may fall flat for another.
That‘s why A/B testing different subject line elements is so critical to optimizing your open rates over time. Create two versions of a subject line, varying just one element at a time (like including an emoji or personalizing the tie-in), and track which one performs best.
Some key variables to test include:
- Length (aim for 4-7 words)
- Emoji use (minimal and contextual)
- Numbers vs. numerals ("three" vs. "3")
- Question vs. statement
- Including a first name
- Positive vs. negative framing
Don‘t forget to test your preview text too – the 140-character snippet that displays next to your subject line in most email clients. A well-crafted preview gives recipients more context to inform their open/delete decision.
Your subject line is the most important sentence in your entire email. It‘s your one shot to convince a busy prospect that your message is worth their precious time and attention.
By eliminating overused words, obsessing over every character, and constantly testing new approaches, you‘ll be well on your way to sky-high open rates and response rates.
Remember: with great power comes great responsibility. Use these data-driven subject line techniques to provide genuine value to your prospects, not to bait and switch.
Your subject line sets the expectation for the rest of your message – so make sure you deliver on the promise of what‘s inside! Get out there and make every word earn its place in the inbox. Happy emailing!
